An Open Email to my Parents
My parents got me a birthday card this year which read,
“Son,
No Matter how old you get, you’ll be still be …”
My response:
I appreciate the gift, but …
the card reads, “Son, No Matter how old you get,”
Kindly find a different card for next year.
Love,
[DirkJohanson] (“Peter Pan-Licious” on a SugardaddyForMe.com)
Thanks for rubbing it in, Mom (I assume she was the one who picked out the card).
Anyway, my parents still think 47 is old. How old school of them!
These days, a guy is only as old as the women he sleeps with. Today that makes me 41, but as recently as last Tuesday night, that made me only 22.
Does this look like a card a 22 year-old should be getting, let alone a 22 YO who spent most of the first three hours of his birthday in a pulsating nightclub in the Hard Rock?! No! It looks like something then-102-year-old New York socialite Brooke Astor had specially commissioned for Anthony Marshall‘s 83rd birthday, or perhaps that Marshall had commissioned to make it look like his mother still loved him, and Hallmark figured that with the typography in place, they’d see if anyone else would buy a copy.
And of all sons, effectively-22-year-old me (at least as of last Tuesday night) received one, which kind of makes me want to go all Anthony Marshall on my parents.
For now, I’ll refrain. I’m claustrophobic, and I don’t want to go to prison like Marshall.
Then again, it would be nice to get my hands on some of that money.
No related posts.
Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.
Rooh.it Plugin
