Naked Bowl I – the Super Bowl its Not.
Tampa hosts the upcoming Super Bowl , and as anyone who has ever been to Tampa for more than five minutes knows, Tampa is not a prudish town. Its the strip club capital of the United States, if not the world, and there’s even a saying, “What happens when your wife thinks you’re at a convention in Orlando, stays in Tampa.”
Unfortunately not just for Guyinists but for everyone around Tampa who needs food, clothing, and shelter, or at least food and shelter, among city authorities there is a mistaken belief that there are still profitable corporations left to relocate here if the city puts on a sterile show as host of the game. Rather than allow Tampa to fulfill its obvious destiny to become the Las Vegas of porn, or the Bangkok of the United States, the authorities have banished Super Bowl halftime show Lingerie Bowl VI to a nudist resort, one of several, just outside of Tampa. That is, if you consider a place where a lot of hot young people (and still kinda hot ex-strippers), many quite fully clothed, really go not to just be naked but to have sex with each other to actually be just a “nudist resort.” And while I personally haven’t had sex on the premises, at least that I can recall, one of my visits, about 3 years ago, led to a very hot foursome at a nearby Best Western that included my escort ex and a smoking, petite, blonde, belly-pierced, tattooed 25 YO that really knew how to twist a cock while sucking on it.
But enough of me, for now. The resort is called Caliente (http://www.calienteresorts.com/index.html). You might remember Caliente from an episode of The Simple Life, when Paris and Nicole stopped by for a while and, like many of the young swingers who frequent the night club, apparently didn’t get naked, either. And while its quite nice, don’t worry, because as far as dues go, the Yellowstone Club its not – you can afford it. Even single guys, often treated like lepers in the lifestyle, can get in sometimes for $20.
Now there’s another controversy involving the Lingerie Bowl, apparently a pay dispute. Its being reported that some of the girls apparently don’t think their football talents are being taken seriously enough. Quarterback Rebecca Reyes, who plays by the name of Reby Sky and is also a player agent, was quoted in the Tampa Bay Times: “I don’t have anything against the lifestyle (“the lifestyle” is insider lingo for swinging, for those of you not in the know, indicating that Reyes is probably not “vanilla” [i.e., non-swinger] or, for that matter, even a “newbie” to the swinger scene), but we as players were having a hard enough time dealing with and defending against the negative stigmas and stereotypes associated with the sport and playing attire before it was announced that we would be playing at a nudist resort.”
Yes, those horrible stigmas and stereotypes about girls, playing football in lingerie yet, that make us not think of them as real football players. Never mind that the best of them probably couldn’t make the first cut in the Xanadu, New York, 6th grade Pop Warner. I guess Reyes thinks she should get paid as much as Ben Roethlisberger and Kurt Warner. The Lingerie Bowlers are apparently only getting $1,000 for the game, while the players on the Steelers and Cards will be getting many times that (the player pay last year was $40,000 for the Patriots, and $78,000 for the winning Giants).
Now I finally know how the feminists keep being able to come up with statistics showing women don’t get paid equally as men!
Of course, if as many people watched the Lingerie Bowl …
Meanwhile, it’ll be interesting to see the crowd reaction. When I picture fans of the Lingerie Bowl, I picture “Da Bears” type-guys eating pizza and farting while they watch, lining up for autographed posters. This year, presumably the live audience will be primarily hot couples, no less scantily clad than the players, recruiting LB VI players for their super post-game orgies – which may explain why the replacement players are willing to play cheaper. If the Nielsen ratings in Land O’Lakes, Florida, drop substantially in the second half of the real game, we’ll know their recruiting efforts were a success.
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